“Marlowe’s the name. The guy you’ve been trying to follow around for a couple of days.”
“I ain’t following anybody, doc.”
“This jalopy is. Maybe you can’t control it. Have it your own way. I’m now going to eat breakfast in the coffee shop across the street, orange juice, bacon and eggs, toast, honey, three or four cups of coffee and a toothpick. I am then going up to my office, which is on the seventh floor of the building right opposite you. If you have anything that’s worrying you beyond endurance, drop up and chew it over. I’ll only be oiling my machine gun.”
- Jack: Couldn't you just inject something right into his heart?
- Dr. Leo Spaceman: I'd love to, but we have no way of knowing where the heart is. See, every human is different.
- Me: How many cats do you have?
- Her: What are you a cop?
- Mark: I wish you guys would do that when I got in.
- John: We do that when you leave.
We’re trying to adopt a cat and we just had our apartment inspected by the craziest woman I’ve ever met.
Did you know:
- Cats don’t like dry food.
- Cats are clumsy and fall all the time.
- Cats don’t like wet food.
- 70% of cat food is the first ingredient listed. Sometimes that’s water, sometimes that’s meat. Always 70% though.
- This cat doesn’t scratch anything, but does scratch everything so watch out.
The body of this post is incredible.
- Howard Stern: Do you think you're a genius?
- Billy Murray: Uh, no. I mean, genius, no. I mean, I'm pretty good at what I do. I'm as good as anyone in my neighborhood.
Michael Bierut (via swisscheeseandbullets)
True! Bad guys are all friends with each other and good guys are all friends with each other, whether they realize it or not.